Dark Paradise
by darkNnerdy
Summary: He's cruel, unfeeling, and a monster. She wants to know why, and all he wants is her. Written for PandorasFF. Rated M.
1. Chapter 1

**This fic was inspired by, and written for PandorasFF. She has been asking for a Dexter type Edward, and she has been incredibly supportive, so this is for her. Lana Del Rey's lyrics to Dark Paradise was what pushed me to write and what this fic was named after. There are references to violence and other M rated related topics. If you aren't comfortable with that, thanks for reading my authors note. See ya later! **

**With the help of Ham, SushiLovesWhitlock, and JamesRamsey this story is possible. **

_**Summary: He's cruel, unfeeling, and a monster. She wants to know why, and he just wants her. Darkward. Written for PandorasFF. Rated M. **_

_**I own nothing.**_

_**Every time I close my eyes  
It's like a dark paradise  
No one compares to you  
I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side**_

**Dark Paradise **

"Do you know what my favorite part was?" His green eyes sparkle with excitement as his fingers draw circles on the steel table separating us.

"Strangling them?"

"That is the assumption." he leans back laughing. "But honestly, my favorite part was the moment just before. That false sense of comfort they had, laying close to me in my bed, an arm slung precariously over my stomach. They had no idea what I was about to do."

"Is it always sexual for you?" I'm more than curious about this. All of his victims have been attractive females, found bound and naked.

"Isn't everything in life about getting off?" he asks, tilting his head to the side.

"You like brunettes, why?"

"Everyone says they're plain, ordinary in every way, yet they taste anything but." He licks his lips, eyeing my long, wavy hair.

I left it down knowing I'd get more answers this way.

"Have you ever wanted to do something, even if you knew it was wrong? That you shouldn't, but you couldn't stop yourself?" My breath catches as his eyes flash to mine.

There is something dark and haunting behind his piercing, green eyes. I can only imagine the number of women he's had squirming with just a look.

"I've wondered many things in my life, Mr. Cullen. Everyone has dark thoughts, but few ever venture outside of them," I tell him, knowing that I've thought about him. I've wondered what his hands would feel like on my thighs, what his mouth would feel like against my skin.

They're only thoughts.

"You're missing out on so much." I squirm in my seat as he smiles at me.

"Your psychiatrist said you lost both your parents when you were young. Has that had any kind of effect on what you've become today?" I try changing the subject, focusing on my notes, but he knows he's affected me.

"You already know this." His smile is cocky as grabs a cigarette and lights it.

"This is being recorded. Whether I know this or not, I need you to say it for the purpose of this interview." My fingers are white knuckling my pen and I can feel a trail of sweat down my neck as he stares at me. His cheek dimples slightly and I know he sees it.

"You mean, being inside the foster care system for fifteen years?" He sits up for the first time, seemingly interested in my question, if not for his bored tone, I'd believe he was.

"There were reports of abuse." I point out. Files, four inches thick, actually. I knew his personal story better than almost anyone.

Being a daughter of a detective, I know where to look for things other people don't. It is in my blood, sitting there waiting to be used. I know things about Edward almost no one else does, not even my father.

The reports of Edward's abuse were something only I had just uncovered.

"Unfounded, yes. I actually had very good foster parents. In fact, I still keep in touch with them." I know this too.

Edward's foster parents had not been in it for the money; they lost their own children many years before Edward came along. I know they loved him, but sometimes love is not only blind, it's skewed.

"Why are you really here, Isabella?" My name on his tongue sent a chill down my spine.

"I'm here today Edward, to try and understand you." I try to sound convincing, hoping he believes me.

Edward is good at catching lies. He is good at a lot of things.

"No you aren't." He shakes his head, leaning across the table as far as he can, before the chains he's cuffed to catch. "You're here because you want to know how I fooled you."

**The chapters are short and to the point. There are 5 total and it will update daily until it's complete. Be warned this is a Dexter type Edward and Bella is a little naughty. Smut will come into play, as well as Edward reminiscing about the things he's done. I am popping my smut cherry with this, so I hope you enjoy it!**

**I'd love to hear from you, so please let me know what you thought!**

**xoxo darknnerdy**


	2. Chapter 2

_**Many thanks to Ham. She's an amazing friend. **_

_**Everytime I close my eyes**_

_**It's like a dark paradise**_

_**No one compares to you**_

_**I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side**_

_**Dark Paradise **_

"A scalpel is a very difficult instrument to get your hands on. Difficult, but not impossible." He says, looking out the window. There is a hint of a smile across his.

"Why are you telling me this?" My eyes narrow at him.

"The feeling of a blade so sharp, so beautiful as it slices through flesh like they were made for each other. That's pure ecstasy, Isabella. You have never in your life, experienced pure bliss until you've had another person's life in your hands." His eyes flutter closed as I scramble to take notes.

"It was like sex to you?"

"You're simplifying things," he bristles. "The trick is to know which areas to cut. It's all about your mood, really. When I'm feeling feisty I go for the thigh. There are so many areas that the blood will just pool beneath them. It's amazing really." I watch as he lets out a sigh, turning back towards me, raising a single brow.

"Did you always use a scalpel?" I stare at my notes, not wanting to make eye contact.

"I had many tools." His head tilts to the side and I watch his fingers as they run over the smooth chains attached to him.

"Did you have... was there one you enjoyed more?" I shook my head, trying not to bite my lip.

"A hunting knife my father in law gave me. It was a beautiful piece. Curved with a hand carved hilt. Amazing what people can do with their bare hands." A shiver ran through me as I tried not to hurl my pen at him. I knew he said that to get a reaction out of me.

"And rope? It says you tied up your victims with a specific rope." I tried to find where I had read about it, but was cut short by an abrupt laugh.

"My last victim, Rosalie. She enjoyed being tied up. The feel of the scarf against her smooth skin. She liked it rough, she begged for me to make the restraints tighter. She was a fun one." He looked down at his nails, a cruel smirk forming on his lips.

"Do you remember the rope, Edward?" I ask, trying to keep his attention on my questions.

"Do you remember the first time we met?" Edward ignores me, his eyes holding me in place. I used to think green eyes were a thing of beauty, that they held so much soul, so much life.

Now they feel more like the gateway to true Hell.

"I think we should focus on this." I turn my head, breaking eye contact as I pulled out a file.

"You were nineteen with legs for days." His smile is cocky as he bites his bottom lip. I run shaky fingers through my hair, trying to distract myself.

"This isn't the time for a trip down memory lane, Mr. Cullen."

"So formal," he chuckles. "The last time you called me Mr. Cullen those legs were wrapped around my face." His knowing smile makes my mouth dry, as I crossed my legs, trying to block the image from my mind. "You remember it too don't you? How my tongue felt against you? How I could make you wet with just a look. You were always so ready for me. So willing."

I place my hands on the table as I look at the two way mirror, grateful that no one was behind there. Edward catches me off guard, the familiar electricity of him being so close, closer than he should, runs along my hand. His fingers trail too close for comfort to mine, making me jump.

"That's enough." I snatch my hands back, rubbing them against my thighs, scolding myself for letting him affect me.

"You don't need to be afraid of me." He isn't hurt by my actions. I'd seen him hurt, and I'd seen him angry. He was enjoying himself here, enjoying my reactions.

"You killed over twenty people."

"But I never once hurt you." He hadn't, and I knew it didn't make it right, but I couldn't help remembering that. "I've missed you, you know."

"You miss the games, Edward." I straighten up, remembering just who this is.

He wasn't the Edward I knew, I wasn't even sure that Edward ever existed.

"You still have the ring," he gestures toward the chain hanging around my neck. "I'd wear mine, but well.. prison." He waves toward the door. An officer is standing out there, waiting for my signal, or for Edward to mess up.

When they first brought Edward in here, there were two of them. One shackled his ankles the other his wrists to the table.

I had lied to get this interview. Charlie went out of town for his fishing trip and it was my only opportunity to talk to Edward without him trying to interfere. I was lucky they only stood outside.

I glance down at my chest and clutch the ring I keep there.

_Fuck. _I'd meant to take it off before I came here.

"It was your mothers. Of course I still have it." I lie. He'd lied too. He'd stolen this ring after I saw it in the mall. I wasn't even aware he'd been watching me then.

I wasn't aware of a lot of things.

He didn't bother calling me out. Only smiling at me, knowing I'd kept it because of him.

"Your first victim, Alice, how old were you when you took her life?" I tuck the ring further into my shirt as I look over my notes, not bothering to give him the satisfaction of the hurt in my eyes.

"I was twenty four," he looks right at me as he answers, his bright green eyes holding me in my spot, making me look up.

"Twenty four?" I try to swallow the bile that's begging for release.

"Do you remember our first date, Isabella?" My mind races as the memory of candles and wine acoust me.

"No," I shake my head, lying to him once again.

"Three days later, Alice Brandon went missing, not to be found until a year later. Did you know they had to use her dental records because her bones were picked clean?" His green eyes sparkle, as a slow, sadistic smile spreads across his face.

"I know all this." I'd seen the pictures. I was forced to if I wanted to take this interview.

"Why are you here?" For the first time Edward was angry. His fist balling tight on the table as he yanks at the chains holding him in place.

"Those girls families need answers." I need answers.

"June fourth, two thousand six. Five days after our second date, Lauren Mallory goes missing, blunt force trauma to her face, her skin is littered with lacerations, not a trace of her blood is left. She'd been found six months later by hikers right behind your house." He spits at me.

"August first, two weeks after you let me take your virginity. I remember just how tight you were, Isabella," he gives me wink, making my teeth clench. "Jessica Stanley goes missing from her job. She was last seen leaving to meet with friends for drinks. Witnesses remember seeing her with a tall man, _very _handsome. They were too drunk to offer any more details. Her bones were later discovered, the knicks on them are her blamed for her cause of death. They believe she was stabbed at least three dozen times; tortured. She was found near the Fork's Police station." A dark menacing smile creeps across his face as he taps the table, a haunting melody those once beautiful fingers played across my skin.

"Edward stop," I can feel the tears pricking at my eyes, and I try to hold them back.

"December sixteenth. One month after I gave you that ring," the chains make a horrible scraping sound as he points toward my neck, a disgusted look on his once handsome face. "Angela Weber's remains were found in the basement of an abandoned building, bound to four posts, naked and covered in her own blood. Every inch of her was covered in bruises, beaten to death, they'd said. I know the real reason, Isabella. Would you like to know it too?" His eyes light up as he leans in close.

"STOP IT!" I scream, backing away from him as a dark chuckle escapes lips I once cherished.

"All of those women were later found to be tortured. Angela was the reason behind my profile, behind them discovering my so-called obsession. She put me on the map, Isabella. She was because of you, Isabella. They all were. " He's standing now, watching me cower away from him, away from what he's done.

"Go to hell."

**AN: Holy shit guys! All the reviews! All the love! I am completely baffled here. Thank you! Thank you so much. To everyone that pimped, RT and showed loved, so many amazing people I owe thanks to. I had to update early, you guys just made my whole week with all the love and so I'm giving back with a little longer chapter.**

**You guys truly know how to make an author feel loved.**

**XOXO darknnerdy **


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you Ham! **

_**Everytime I close my eyes**_

_**It's like a dark paradise**_

_**No one compares to you**_

_**I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side**_

**Dark Paradise**

"You wound me, Isabella." His smile is vicious as he watches me pace the room, a far cry from the charming ones I've been so used to.

"Why kill them?" I ask, my heels clicking on the linoleum, offering me a distraction as I try and compose myself.

It has been two years since I'd last seen Edward Cullen. He'd left me, promising to be home in a few days, only to disappear for years. Not a word. No calls, no letters. He'd kissed me goodbye before the sun came up, telling me he loved me, before walking out our door.

"Why not?" He asks, looking genuinely curious.

I stare at him, wide eyed, wondering how I ever got involved with him. How I hadn't _seen _any of this before.

"Did you enjoy it? No... scratch that. You enjoyed it." I shake my head, cursing myself for asking.

"And so did you." He sits back, watching with a broad smile as I freeze.

"Are you out of your mind?" I'm amazed at some of the things he's said, but this takes the cake.

"Clinically, they think so." His chuckle reminds me of Edward, _my _Edward. The one that used to slide into the shower in the morning with me, his strong arms circling me, a wet kiss to my neck. The one that surprised me with breakfast Sunday mornings. The same one that stood at the end of a long aisle, never looking sexier in his three piece suite.

It's the wicked smile, and the savage look in his beautiful eyes that slap me into reality.

"You killed all of those women, because why? Because of some sick twisted fantasy? Is that what I was to you?" It hurt to think that's what I was to him, but I'd had a year to come to terms with the idea that the man I loved, the man I'm married to, was a serial killer.

"You were different." He shrugs. "Those women were disposal, they meant less than nothing to me. They were murdered so you could live." My eyes widened at his confession.

"So you blame me?" Laughing in his face, I turn, gripping the table as I look him square in the eyes. "You are such a fucking coward."

""Oh no, baby girl. I'm not the coward here." His voice is smooth as he sits, unfazed by my mood change. "Don't act so surprised. I came home many nights covered in blood, and you willingly rode me, screaming my name before I could even wash it all off." He raises his brow, daring me to deny it.

"After trips you told me were about hunting." I scream, ready to wrap my own hands around his throat.

"You got off on the blood, Isabella." He laughs, but I see the anger flashing in his green eyes. He's pissed at me, but he deserves my anger.

"So did you." Gritting my teeth, I stare at him, wondering what's going through his mind as he watches me like I'm his prey. Like I'm one of the many victims he used. He's enjoying this.

"It was a thrill to you." He challenges.

"That's a lie."

"Do you remember the third time I came home? The blood wasn't even dried yet. Your ass had my hand prints on them in that girls blood. You, bouncing on my cock, slamming down on top of me. You didn't even bother taking me to the bedroom. You let me fuck you right on the counter." His smile was devilish as he relieved that night. " I can still remember pushing you down onto me, your screams. So much more enticing than Jessica's." His smile was arrogant as he drummed his fingers against the steel.

"You're a sick bastard!"

"And you're the sick bitch who loved every minute of it. Every minute of me." A sadistic chuckle escapes him. "Admit it, Isabella. Tell me you didn't like the feel of my wet, bloodsoaked hands all over your body. My fingers inside of you, pumping into you. Tell me how every time you screamed my name, you weren't thinking about it." He growls, his fist slamming against the table as I glare at him.

"This was supposed to be about helping people. Not about us. Jesus Christ. What have you done to me?" I put my head in my hands, letting the tears fall. My heart was breaking all over again for him, because of him.

"You watched the news. It wasn't hard to piece it all together. I was quite sloppy after all." I look up at his smug smile, trying to understand him.

"Were you going to kill me?" I pull the chair as far away from him as I can, sitting in the corner of the room. I take one deep breath in, calming myself, trying not to let him get me worked up again.

His eyes trail over my legs, taking in my skirt making my stomach flip, fluttering as the familiar need I once had for him tries to take hold of me.

"You and I aren't so different, Isabella. You hide it as well as I did. The only difference is you deny what you really feel to anyone but me. I, on the other-hand, willing let it show." I focus on his orange jumpsuit, it's snug against his chest, showing me just how much he'd really changed since I last saw him.

In the news he always looked so lean, toned. Edward had always had an amazing body. He'd been a runner, every morning waking up before me to jog.

Was that a lie to?

"You didn't answer my question, Edward." I wipe at the silent tears that have fallen down my cheeks, telling myself he was wrong.

"Sometimes in life, not knowing is the best part."

We stare at eachother for a long while as he lights another cigarette.

I hadn't accomplished a single thing by coming here, except hurting myself, and giving him what he wanted.

To see me again.

**AN: I'm going to expand this by another chapter or two. **

**Anyway, thank you so much for the amazing response to this. Everyone's dubbing Edward as serialkillerward and I LOVE IT! For those of you wanting to know how I picture him, just visit my twitter. You'll know what I mean! **

** I'm always blown away when I read a new review. You guys seriously rock! Thank you.**

**Tomorrow is an iffy day of when I can post. It will probably come late in the day. But I might have something extra for you tonight.**

**XOXO Darknnerdy**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you Ham!**

_**Everytime I close my eyes**_

_**It's like a dark paradise**_

_**No one compares to you**_

_**I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side**_

**Dark Paradise**

"Your last victim..." I trail off, sifting through my file. That's what took the police so long to find him, what he spent the last year doing.

"Rosalie Hale. Beautiful, curves for days, but a mouth that ruined the package." His lips curls, a disgusted look marring his beautiful features.

"She didn't fit your profile." I grab Rosalie's photo, her long blonde hair and big blue eyes are nothing like the other women. She's a mystery.

"Do you remember our trip to Florida? When you introduced me to your mother?" His head tilts to the side, eyes scanning the picture in my hands.

"You took your time with her, why?" I flip it over, not giving him the satisfaction of seeing her.

"I don't need a picture, Isabella. I can remember every detail of her, quite well." His fingers drum against the steel, and with a long sigh he continues. "She was a horrible woman to your mother. Renee lost her job because of Rosalie. She was so full of herself, so sure she was invincible. I thought it only right that I dispose of her."

I shiver at the word dispose. He makes it sound so simple, so easily remedied.

"She was a fighter, much like you. Smart mouthed and sassy. She actually thought what I was doing was kinky. Women can be so confusing, you know? One minute they want it all, then when I don't want their filth touching me they get sensitive." His disgust is written all over his face, the way his eyes twitch, and the sneer on his curling lips.

"Did you..." I can't finish my question, the taste of bile replacing my words. I remind myself there were more than twenty women, twenty women that he played with, and tortured.

"I've never forced any woman, Isabella. You have the reports." He's slips purse, showing his annoyance at me. As if I offended him with my question.

"Did you... Did you enjoy it?" I grit my teeth, angry at myself and at him.

"Look at you, interested in what I do for a living. You really do make a fantastic wife." He smiles at me with pride, making my heart beat faster.

"Edward," I sigh, wishing he would stop.

"Is that jealousy? There's no need to be jealous of dead women. It's always just been you, Bella." My eyes snap to his, amused green meeting enraged brown.

"She was found without any hair left." I shudder, remembering the call on the scanners. She was bound, just like the others, but not a single strand of hair was left anywhere on her body.

"Everyone knows a good serial killer keeps a memento." He glances at my hair, offering me a crooked grin.

"Did you ever regret what you did?" I know he doesn't, but I want to hear him say the words.

"About killing women, or hurting you?"

"The women." I try to distance myself from us, try to tell myself that I want an answer for both. The longer I sit here, the more I realize I only want one answer.

"Does it matter?" He knows it does.

"No." Yes.

"Would you let me hold you? It's been such a long time, and you look exhausted."

"Stay away from me, asshole." I spit at him.

"So much like Rosalie." His shoulders shake with silent laughter as he watches my eyes go wide.

"Don't you dare compare me to her." I hiss.

"Why not? Remember how you used to claw my back when I'd pound your pussy? That little bitch clawed my arms to hell before I snapped her neck. It was a waste of beautiful girl." His head shakes, and I know he wants to run his hands through his hair. It's falling over his eyes, hiding his sexiest feature.

He loves his hair short.

"_Leave it long enough for her to pull." _He once told a barber after we first met. He used to do little things like that for me. Like shaving so it didn't burn my cheeks when he kissed me, or distract me when he was between my legs.

I could always tell when he was upset though. His fingers would make a beeline for his hair. Raking and pulling through it, like it would solve all his problems.

I may not know everything about him, the real him anyway, but I do know his habits.

"Do you see how considerate I was with you? I let you sink your teeth into me, mark me, slap me. I let you do all those things and never once did I lay a hand on you."

"What goes on in there?" I point to his head, trying to understand him.

"I'd like to think you know me. I mean we did spend years together." He gives me a pout, his bottom lip sticking out, making me shiver.

"I don't know you at all." I shake my head, which is already feeling fuzzy.

"Can we talk for a minute, baby. Just you and I, like old times?" He leans forward, placing his chin on his hands. That sweet smile he flashes is just like the first time we met, and for a moment I feel myself giving into him.

"We are talking, Edward." I straighten, blinking myself out of his spell.

"No. I'm trying to make you open up, to accept that your feelings for me are still there, and you're all deny deny deny. It's frustrating really." Shrugging he pulls out another cigarette. I watch the puff of smoke billow from his mouth, and fight the urge to kiss him.

I always hated his smoking, making him go on the deck when he lit up. The taste of tobacco on his tongue when I kissed him drove me crazy.

Everything about him drove me crazy.

"Your doctors said you're obsessed." I change the subject, catching his eyes on me, something shining in them I can't decipher.

"Doctors say a lot of things. For example, the doctors testing the evidence, they can't pin a single thing to me. It's all circumstantial. I could have bail, all because of those doctors you spoke to." He blows a ring of smoke in the air, as if he doesn't have a care in the world.

"They'd never grant you that." My throat tightens and my hands shake as I think about him being released. "And I'm recording this, it's all they'll need."

He smiles his infamous crooked smile at me, as he rubs his chin. "Oh sweetheart. You would never hand that over. You're recording this for you."

"You're wrong."

"Am I? I wonder, will you touch yourself when you listen to this? I remember what you look like, spread across our bed, open, waiting. Do you remember our honeymoon when you let me watch you get yourself off?" I watch as his teeth rake across his lips, and I bite the inside of my cheek.

"It's okay to think about me. I still think about you. When I wrap my hand around my cock. You felt like silk around me, so warm, tight, and wet. Let me touch you." I let my eyes close as his voice washes over me. I have to remind myself what he's done, that he'd kill me if I got too close. "It's tempting isn't it? And you haven't let another man touch you since me either." His cocky grin makes my fingers twitch.

"How could you possibly know that?" Ever since he left, I drowned in work, letting it consume me. When I felt lonely, or I thought about him, about what he would do to me, I bought a friend.

The battery operated won't disappoint you, or leave you. They're the perfect companion.

"Because I'd kill them, and you know it." It's a promise, I know he'd kill anyone that touched me. It sends a thrill through me knowing it too.

"I'm not some prize, Edward. I'm not your trophy. You don't own me." I sneer.

"Oh but you are. You're mine, and the minute you let another mans hands on you," he pauses, anger clouding his green eyes. "I'll remind you who you belong to, and I'll make you watch me kill him." He's calm as he watches me, but I can feel the challenge behind his words. He thinks I'd test him, and I would.

"Why'd you pick me?" I ask, looking at the clock. I've been in here with him over four hours and even if a part of me doesn't want to leave, I know I need to.

"You were the most beautiful thing I had ever laid my eyes on." He relaxes in his seat, his green eyes looking at me with so much love, the same love I saw on our wedding day. I know what's really there, the hate lurking just behind them, waiting to stomp on me all over again.

"And I was the naive teenager that loved you for it." I shake my head at myself.

"Love. You pretend, and you may fool your father, but you love me." I do.

I take one final look at the clock, suddenly needing air, and the unmistakable sound of Edward's chair scraping the floor startles me.

"Don't worry, we'll see each other again." He looks me over, and I know he has more to say. I'm thankful he doesn't, I don't think I could take anymore.

_Just let me go Edward. _I try to say with my eyes, even though I know I might crumble if he does.

"I doubt that, Edward." I say instead, and gather my papers, catching his fingers moving close to mine on the table. "Don't." I don't even bother looking up at him again, knowing I'll cry if I do.

He's not worth it, even if I want him to be.

"I do still love you." I stop breathing, his word like a punch to my gut.

"You're a sociopath. A psychopath with no redeeming qualities. You don't feel anything. You can't love me, you never did." I put no emotion behind my words, even though my heart is thumping wildly in my chest.

"I've always been impressed with the things you do with your mouth, Isabella, but lying isn't one of them." With that I knock on the door, giving Edward one last look, remembering everything about him.

I only hope I can let him go this time.

**So yeah, this was supposed to be a tiny chapter, no more than 600 words. It's a monster, just like Edward, who refused to shut up. **

**Anyway... there are 3 chapters left. I plan to post another tonight since it's already written. Just gotta look it over. Would you rather wait till tomorrow, or get another post tonight? I know this is heavy, so I'm going by you guys. **

**Also some of you are pervy and LOVE Edward. To you guys I just gotta say FUCK YES! He's a dark bastard, but I love him!**

**Thanks guys, your love is awesome!**

**XOXO darknnerdy**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you Ham!**

_**Everytime I close my eyes**_

_**It's like a dark paradise**_

_**No one compares to you**_

_**I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side**_

**Dark Paradise**

"I know, daddy." I wring my hands as I step into my house, laying my messenger bag on the table. "It was a mistake." I tell him, because it was.

"_You're damn right it was! How could you go behind my back like that? Edward is dangerous, Bella. You shouldn't be anywhere near him. Wife or no wife." _

"I'm an adult dad," I try to remain calm, telling myself he's only worried. "You know you can't stop me from seeing him, I just needed to know some things."

"_You're my only kid, Bells. That man fooled us both." _I could hear the sadness in his voice. Edward had been like a son to him. They fished together almost every weekend, and when they weren't, they were at the local cop bar watching a game and drinking.

"I still love him," I choke back a sob and I could hear Charlie fighting back tears as well.

"_I know, Bells. Just... let me have a an officer stay with you til this trial is over?" _He'd tried this twice now, and I'd refused.

"He can't hurt me. I have the gun, and my doors are always locked." I tried to reassure him, but I knew it did little to calm his fears.

I hang up, letting out a long sigh. Phone calls with my dad have become so few and far between since Edward was arrested. It's not that I don't want to talk to him, but I have nothing to say.

For the next week all I think about is Edward. The way he'd whisper in my ear, making me smile. His vows on our wedding day.

I think about his touches, and our first kiss.

I pull out the box in my closet, full of our memories, and everyday I look at them. Pictures of us smiling. Ticket stubs to movies. A rose. The necklace he gave me on our fifth anniversary.

I look at them everyday and everyday I hate him just a little bit more. I hate him, truly and completely hate him, but I love him more.

At night when I sleep, he haunts my dreams. His arms wrap around me and his kisses are promises that I'm enough. His smile, his breath against my lips.

It's Friday when I get home from work, declining to hang out with anyone from work. I never do, and yet they keep asking. I'd rather sit at home, wishing I could see him again, and hating myself for it.

He was right about the tape. I've let it put me to sleep every night this week. His words, his voice. I'm obsessed.

My stomach's in knots by nightfall, and I don't even bother eating dinner. He's all I think about, all I see. He's a delicious nightmare I'm too scared to let go of.

I escape to my bedroom before six, slipping out of my heels. I wore them for Edward on Monday. I knew he'd enjoy them. Heels and a skirt. Nothing looked better on a woman, he'd told me.

Slipping into my tub, I let the steaming hot water envelope me, as my mind wanders back to Edward.

_Always_ Edward. I can't even fantasize about another man.

He's always had a thing for a woman in heels. He was more than thrilled when I got my first job offer as a journalist, knowing full well I'd be in them constantly.

I had come home from my first day, wearing thrift store heels I had found for the interview, only to be surprised by a dozen pair from him. Edward was a leg man, always touching them, kissing them, wrapping himself in them. He said nothing looked better on a woman with beautiful legs, than heels.

It was his version of a dozen roses and candy. It was perfect.

After trying them on, I had to agree. I'd never felt sexier, that was for sure.

Edward had bent me over the bed as soon as I'd put on the last pair. I could still remember his growl as he bit into my inner thigh that night. His hand in my hair, yanking me back so I was against his chest, sweat soaking us both, his lips crushed to mine.

I shiver, remembering just how hot he felt against me.

Closing my eyes, I let myself get lost in the memory, as I run my hand over the scar on my thigh. I shivered remembering the way his tongue felt running over me, licking every inch of skin he could. His teeth marks are a dark reminder, one he promised I would never forget, that I am his.

My fingers slide further up, my stomach flutters and my toes curl, picturing his hands on me, his own fingers sliding in and out of me. A whimper escapes as the pad of my thumb rubs against my clit, trying desperately to recreate the feel of him teasing me.

I reach over onto the table beside my tub with my free hand, not bothering to open my eyes as I fumble for my vibrator.

With my thumb rubbing circles over my clit and my body trembling, I let myself fall further into the tub, whispering his name as I push my toy inside of me.

My knees fall to the side, splashing water out of the tub, as I work it inside of me, moaning, begging him to fuck me. With every thrust, I rub harder, imaging Edward's cruel eyes on me, making me slick and driving me crazy.

With one last frenzied thrust, I gasp, tensing all over as my whole body comes undone.

"We can do better than that, Isabella." I hear the voice of the man I'd just come to, his low chuckle making my eyes fly open.

"Edward!"

Before I can move, his hand is in the water, his palm flat against me, pushing the vibrator into me hard and covering my mouth with his own, swallowing my cries of pleasure.

**Don't kill me? **

**XOXO darknnerdy**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you, Ham!**

**So yeah you guys blew me away last chapter. I've never had the privilege of so many great reviews, so quickly, in one chapter! You guys are so fucking amazing. Thank you! For me as an author, hearing from so many of you, from the readers, to authors I look up to, it is simply indescribable.**

**You have all made my entire week so much better.**

_**Everytime I close my eyes**_

_**It's like a dark paradise**_

_**No one compares to you**_

_**I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side**_

**Dark Paradise**

Edward trails a single finger up my stomach, between my breasts, running it over the curve of my nipple. He's gentle, the pad of his thumb leaving a trail of goosebumps in his wake, burning my skin, making me moan.

My eyes are closed, a wet washcloth replacing the bright lights of the bathroom and hiding Edward's wild green eyes from me. He's behind me, my head lying on his chest, my legs spread wide.

"I want you to take it," his lips touch my ear, as his hand in the water circles around mine. "Show me, Isabella. Show me exactly what it is you want."

"Edward..." his finger stops over my lips, I can taste him in my mouth, as he rubs his thumb over them, slowly slipping it inside, against my tongue.

"The only thing I want to hear out of you, is moaning." I whimper as he pulls away, his fingers replaced by his his hand on my jaw, sliding down my neck. "Not a word."

His hand between my legs is guiding me, pushing the tip of the toy inside me, teasing me.

I can feel his hot breath on my ear, his teeth caressing me as his hand around my throat strokes the sensitive skin beneath my ear.

"There is nothing more beautiful than the sight of you laid bare before me." He says as helps guide the vibrator inside of me. "Just like that, show me how much you missed me, how bad you want my cock inside you." Releasing my hand, he slides a single finger up, barely touching me, making my whole body ache for him.

I can feel his smile against my cheek, his hand closing tighter around my neck, as I work the toy inside of me, as he rubs harder, faster.

"That's right, baby girl, fuck yourself for me." He adds more pressure, and I push harder, rocking against him, needing to feel him, to have him.

"Jesus... fuck." I can barely talk as his grip around me tightens, sending wave after wave of pleasure through me, building up and falling as my hips lift and my back arches.

"You always were so wild in bed," he chuckles in my ear and disappears behind me.

I fall backwards, the rag slipping off my face, the vibrators falling into the tub, forgotten.

"What.. what just happened?" I pant, pissed and tense as I grip the tub.

"My turn." His cruel green eyes flash as he offers me his hand. Everything's forgotten as my teeth slip over my bottom lip and I lace my fingers between his.

I'm barely out of the tub when I feel his strong hands under my knees, his fingers pushing into my skin as he lifts me, pulling my wet body close to his.

"Two years is a long time not to be inside of you," he growls, and his lips crush to mine. Teeth scrape and tongues beg for more. The passion, the aggression, his need that I've missed so damn much are back and I can't get enough.

"I won't lose you again, not this time." He sets my bare ass onto my tiny counter, the cold glass hitting my back, making me yelp.

"You won't," I promise. I can feel him between my legs, the heat driving me crazy.

"Like you ever had a choice," his laugh is deep and dark, a sadistic smile, his bright green eyes watch me, and then I'm screaming.

The force behind his first thrust sends my back into the glass, the second thrust and he's slamming his fist behind me, shattering it. My blood mixing with his, his cock inside of me, pushing, pulling.

He's laying his head on my shoulder, his hands on the broken mirror behind me, and I can feel his opens lips, his tongue, his teeth. It's this moment, his tenderness, that drives me wild.

He bites down onto my shoulder, a little sadistic laugh escaping him as I yelp, and I know it was a lie.

"I hate you," I breath into his ear, knowing he'll punish me. Knowing that's all it will take.

"You should really fucking learn to put that mouth to better use, Isabella," He sneers, his teeth pin me, biting into my shoulder as his fingers wind into my hair. I can feel the glass cutting me, slicing my skin open as he pounds into me. "Do you like it when I fuck you hard?" A single hard thrust sends him deep inside of me, smashing my back into the broken glass.

The pain, makes me scream and the pleasure has me begging. His lips, his fingers, he's covering every inch of my body, marking me, destroying me as he fucks me.

He gives my hair a hard tug before he's out of me, lifting me off the counter and bending me over.

I can see his face in the broken glass, our blood smeared across it, making him look deadly.

"Just like old times," he runs two fingers over my pussy, spreading me open for him. "So bloody, so beautiful." His free hand slides over my blood soaked back and I can't take my eyes off him.

"You should try to hold on," he gives a wink and a vicious smirk as he pushes into me sending me forward. He laughs as I lose my balance and he grabs my hips, fingers digging in deep as he pulls me back onto him.

With every thrust I can feel my back screaming from the pain. My skin slapping against his, the sound of his breath coming in harsh as his eyes watch me has me on edge. My fingers grip the sink as I try to focus, but I can feel my body beginning to give over to him.

"Not yet," He slows down his pace, and my eyes narrow. "Don't be fucking greedy."

"Stop teasing me," I grit my teeth, knowing he wants something. I've played this game before.

"Just a question," I can feel him sliding inside of me, his fingers on my clit again. "You love me." It's not a question.

"I love you," I say and he rewards me with as he picks up his pace. I look away from him, lying my flushed face against the cool counter, as I feel him move inside of me.

I've never felt anything better than when he's inside of me. Being connected, being so close to him, it's perfection and I crave it.

"I want you with me, Isabella." He slams into me and I scream, putting my hands on the broken glass, slicing them open. "I need you with me." His grip is hard, and his eyes are begging. I see the promise and the threat in them - I'll kill you.

"Come with me," he leans over me, whispering in my ear. It sends shivers down my battered back and I feel as if I'm vibrating around him as I let go.

I scream his name as he goes weak against me. His hands disappear from my legs, and he's pulling me onto the wet tile below us.

"Talk to me," I say as my heart beats slow, and I run my fingers through his damp hair.

I have so many questions, so many things that I know will go unanswered, but I don't want him quiet, and I won't push.

"Just tell me," he pauses, looking up at me. "Will you go with me?"

I stare down at him, knowing I would follow him anywhere. I would have left the first time with him.

"Edward..." I start, closing my eyes, trying to find the words. His angry green eyes flash behind my lids and I can feel as he presses his lips against mine.

"Forever together remember?" I hear the words and feel a sharp prick in my thigh.

"What did you do?" I panic, trying to move my arms, trying to stop him. I can feel my entire body beginning to shake, my heart is pounding and the blood is rushing in my ears, drowning out my cries.

"Don't fight it, everything is going to go numb, Isabella. Then you'll feel pressure, but it won't last. Just try and relax," I watch as he lays my head on the floor and picks up his jeans, pulling them on.

I try to speak, to ask him why, but my throat is closing and my eyes are becoming heavy.

"Don't give me those sad brown eyes. You know I don't like that." I can't lift my head, but I watch as he laces up his boots. His fingers swollen and blood stained. "We're going to go on a little trip, okay? Just you and me."

Black dots replace the clear picture of him before me. My mind becomes dizzy and I can feel him lift me once again, planting a tender kiss on my lips. I can feel myself relaxing against him, before everything becomes numb, and I curse my body for betraying me.

"Remember that you love me," it's the last thing I hear as the darkness consumes me.

**So one more chapter. A lot of you have so many questions, some will be answered, some won't. I haven't had time to answer reviews, but once this is finished, I will reply to all of you. **

**As for the final chapter, it'll come tomorrow sometime.**

**Stay tuned... **

**XOXO darknnerdy**


	7. Chapter 7

_**Everytime I close my eyes**_

_**It's like a dark paradise**_

_**No one compares to you**_

_**I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side**_

**Dark Paradise**

**PART ONE **

"Shhh..." He sweeps the hair off my sweat drenched forehead, kissing it softly. His lips sting, making me wince and I can feel a tear escape the corner of my eye.

I struggle to clear the fog behind my eyes, squinting at the bright light above me. I'm no longer in my bathroom, but I'm still naked. And I'm still alive.

"I prefer not to wear the latex gloves," he says, turning towards me. "With the other's it always felt needed. It was never about evidence, cleaning up afterwards took care of that. The fantasy wasn't about touching them, so why taint it?" I can just make out his form as I blink.

"I hope you don't mind. Things with us have always been so much more... intimate. It seems like a waste not to feel you against me in everyway possible, doesn't it?"

I try to speak, to ask why, but my lips won't move. The taste of rubber fills my mouth, my arms are strapped down, and my eyes widen as I try to kick out.

I blink back tears as I turn my head towards him, biting down on the ball in my mouth, hoping to wedge it loose, but Edward catches me.

"Just a minute." I feel his fingers brush against me, and his smile is frightening.

I close my eyes trying to block him, as the images race in my mind. Edward leaning over me, his hands holding me down, his breath in my ear as I cry out in pain.

That smile.

"Oh god..." I struggle against the restraints he has me in, desperate to break free, to run.

My heart pounds as the plastic holding me begins to burn my skin, I wiggle my feet, my arms. Everything becomes tight, suffocating. Black spots scatter across the lights above me and my mind spins out of control.

He's taken me.

I can feel the cold steel beneath me begin to swallow me, a dark reminder that I mean nothing to him. That I'm just another victim, another toy.

My body thrashes, and I can feel my throat close as the taste of leather consumes my mouth.

"Isabella don't panic," he lays a single hand on my abdomen, another against my cheek, and I curse him as my heart rate evens and my breathing slows. "It's only a gag. You aren't dying." Yet. He doesn't say it, but I can feel it in his touch, see it in his wide, green eyes.

"Here, let me help." His hands are gentle as he lifts my head, the sound of buckles hitting the table startling me. "Don't," he warns as I open my mouth, yelping. "If you scream, I'll put it back."

He brings a glass to my face, pulling a straw to mouth. "It's only water. The drugs were to get you here. You don't need them," I take a long pull of the icy water, letting it cool the burn in my throat.

"Sorry about that," he chuckles, standing over me. "I just wanted to see what it looked like on you." The gag swings in his hand, and he smiles down at me.

I can feel the muscles relax in my face as I look back at him. The shock of what he's doing hits me like a ton of bricks, making me shake.

"It was bit much, huh?" He lays the ball gag on the table behind him. Leaning back he stares at me for a moment. "Still as beautiful as the day we met."

His knuckles run over my cheek, and I flinch away from him.

"What are you doing?" My voice trembles as I try to look around me. Everything is covered in plastic. The walls, the ceiling. It's like he's wrapped us in a bubble, but I know this isn't for my safety.

"It's bring your wife to work day, Isabella."

"This isn't funny, Edward." I wiggle my fingers, feeling for anything, for some way to free myself.

"Don't struggle. It's plastic wrap. Amazing what that stuff can do. You won't be able to break free without this." he holds up a scalpel, twisting it in the light. "It's my favorite." He places it on a metal table close to my head, rolling it alongside himself as he fumbles with a table covered in plastic.

"The one great thing about having a father in the medical field, is having him show you everything he knows." I watch as he picks up a small electric saw. "He was so adamant that I learn it all. The first was anatomy of the human body. I guess you can say I got my fascination for what I do from him."

"Not so sure he'd be very proud of my work, but I do enjoy it." He turns toward me slowly, switching it on, and a cry escapes me. "Oh god. No, this one isn't for you."

"Edward please stop this." I beg, trying to move any part of my body I can. The cellophane is so tight against me I can feel it burning my skin.

"You wanted to get to know the man behind the mask, Isabella."

"Not like this." I try to shake my head, wondering why he couldn't have a conversation with me like an adult. Instead of getting angry and wanting to play his cruel game with me.

"No," he shakes his head, leaning against the wall. "Exactly like this. It's the only way you can truly accept me."

"By strapping me down to a table?" I ask, my fists clenching as I watch him.

"Would you have heard me out any other way? Would you have been able to look at these things?" He picks up a pair of forceps, running a single finger over the hard steel. "There is beauty in this, in every single instrument in this room. Seeing isn't always believing. Tt isn't always how you understand the workings of a beautiful mind." He looks at me for a moment, his eyes thoughtful, as he moves towards me.

"And you think that's what all this is? Beautiful?" Dread runs through my blood, turning it to ice, pumping it, fueling my fears.

"I think it can be." The excitement in his eyes worries me.

"If you would just cut me loose. Just let me sit up." I plead with him. I can feel the plastic digging into my chest making it harder to breath.

"No. I like you laid out for me. Your body is a canvas. So mesmerizing, so absolutely breathtaking." His fingers trail up my shin, over my knee and thigh. His eyes sparkle, as he watches the tiny goosebumps they leave behind. "You'll enjoy this." He smiles down at me, enjoying the reaction my body has to him.

"It's cold in here, Edward." I grit my teeth. I lie.

"It's warm in here, Isabella and you really shouldn't lie to me. Not in here." As if to push his point, he picks up the scalpel, replacing his fingers with the blade.

"Don't do this..." I shake my head, fighting back tears as I feel the cold medical steel against me.

"It's the back of the blade. Stop being a child." He snaps, quick like a snake, he turns the blade, slicing my thigh.

I bite my cheek, drawing blood, trying hard not to scream as tears fall from my eyes.

"Do you know why I never brought you here?" He runs the blade over the flesh of my hip and I squeeze my eyes shut. "The fantasy, the thrill. You're the life. The one that I wanted, that I craved. I wanted you in my bed, by my side. To bare my children. Not here. This place was _never meant _for you. It was created because of you, but never ever for you."

"Edward..." I hold my breath, his words confusing me, thrilling me.

"All of those women, screaming and crying. I'd barely even laid a hand on them before they'd fainted. I could never hold their hands, or lay beside them. I couldn't even stand the thought of their lips on me." He's disgusted, spitting the words at me.

"You though, Isabella." The blade trails over my stomach. "You are my little fighter. So much stronger than any of them. I've fantasized about this moment. How you'd react, what you'd say, the looks you'd give me." He stops, reaching my face and I control the fear within me, looking right into his eyes.

"Be very still, Isabella." He whispers in my ear, and I feel his finger plunge into me. "I don't want to hurt you." A low moan escapes me, as he moves my hair to the side. He places a gentle kiss behind my ear, his fingers moving deeper, making me wet, and I feel the blade replacing his lips.

He's slow, methodical in his movements. Touching and torturing me. I can feel the blood on my neck, and the stinging on my skin.

"Such a good girl." I breath through my nose as his lips touch my cut, I try and fight the urge to move against his hand as he cups me, moving his fingers in and out.

His eyes drift close as he pumps his fingers inside of me. My breath catches, the beginning of my release building, his voice the catalyst.

The women, the blood, his need for me. I can't control it.

"You're going to kill me aren't you?" Tears fall from my face, and my cheeks flush, as I turn to look at him. One smile, wicked and sweet, eyes so green, so harsh. He's my undoing.

"I'm going to do so much more than that."

**SO many thank yous go out to Ham. Her hand holding and not threatening to flounce me over this chapter, she's just so amazing. **

**JamesRamsey, dude you are awesome. Thank you. **

**Now this was supposed to be it, boom, the end! BUTT yeah. This ending was massive, and a lot of you were right. No way could I clean it all up with just ONE chapter. So you get part two... tomorrow, because this just took it out of me. I need sleep and a clear head LOL.**

**Reviews are welcomed, loved and appreciated. You have all blown me away, it's unbelievable the things you guys have said, the pimping, just seeing people talk about this on twitter and FB. I can't even with you guys. I love you all. **

**Until tomorrow... **

**XOXO darknnerdy**


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you, Ham. I love you more than you know!**

**If you haven't heard this song, turn it on, turn it up, and enjoy this ride.**

_**Just give me a reason, **_

_**Just a little bit's enough **_

_**Just a second, we're not broken **_

_**Just bent and we can learn to LOVE again. **_

_**Oh, it's in the stars **_

_**It's still written in the scars on our hearts **_

_**We're NOT broken**_

_**Just bent and we can learn to love again.**_

**Dark Paradise**

**Part Two**

**The End **

"This isn't you," I shake my head, denying what's right in front of me. Denying the women that I've seen, the bodies, the blood.

"This is exactly who I am, whom I've always been. We need to get past this if you want us to move on." His fingers leave me, as he backs away.

"Move on? Move on to what? You locking me up, doing this to me whenever you want?"

"I just want a life with you. A marriage where I don't have to hide. Where you'll enjoy my work as much as I do. I never lied to you." He circles the table I'm on, his hand hovering just over me.

"You never told me anything either." I sneer, and his smile turns devilish.

"Oh my sweet stupid girl. Are we back at this again?"

"So I enjoyed the blood, the sex. That hardly means I knew you were murdering women." Lies. I knew. Maybe not everything. Maybe not the details, but I knew.

"FOR YOU!" he roars, slashing my arm with the blade. I scream this time, loud and hard, making my throat burn in protest.

I fight against the plastic, as he laughs at me, making my blood boil.

"I killed those women. Fuck yes, I killed them. And I enjoyed every single minute of it." He says it slowly, as if to make love to the words. "They are dead for you. You lived and they died. Would you rather die? Is that what you're saying, Isabella?" His face is so close to mine, and I can see it in his eyes, his skewed version of love that I crave and the hurt that I would rather have death than I would him.

He's got the blade on my neck, pressing it so hard that I can feel the skin below it break.

"No," I try to turn from him, ashamed that I'd rather live and have him, than die and not.

His lips are on mine, his need takes my breath making me dizzy.

"Please don't make me kill you." he breathes into my mouth as he lets me go.

I watch him for a long time, moving around the tiny room, rearranging his tools, mumbling to himself. It reminds me of when he'd cook dinner, so invested in his work.

The thought brings tears to my eyes.

"Those women..." I'm not stupid. I know he'd kill again.

"I didn't have a choice." His hands grip the table, his back to me, and his head down.

"Why them. Why do you need to kill them?"

"Have you ever loved something so much that you hated it? That every time you looked at it, all you could think about was wrapping your hands around it, squeezing until you see the lights leave them?"

Maybe.

"This, Isabella." He takes the scalpel, making me flinch, cutting the plastic around my hand bringing to to his chest. His fingers grip mine as he laces them together. "Have you ever wanted to pull out your own heart just so they could see it only beats for them?" I can feel it thumping in his chest, beating wildly against my hand. "This is yours. It's always been yours."

I have no words, there isn't a single thing I could say right now. I know it's sick, that he's more twisted than I'll ever understand, but my hand next to his heart, feeling it, only draws me to him.

"You lie to yourself everyday. You tell yourself I'll change, that I'll stop. Yet you really don't want that. I've never been anyone else but who I am right now. You see what you want, what I wanted you to see." His glare is icy, but his skin is burning me.

"I see you." I try, but it's a lie.

"No," he laughs at me. "You see the person I needed to be in order to obtain you."

"You have me."

"I have a liar. Someone who can't get past the women buried in the ground. Someone who loves a person who doesn't exist. Who never did."

"I loved what you gave me. I love this part of you too." And I do. Always.

"Did you know the women I killed begged for death. They begged for it when I gave them a choice. All except Rosalie." He moves away from me, sitting on the stool next to his table. "I gave them a choice. You or them, and everyone but her chose herself."

"What?" I blink, shocked.

"They had a choice, I always gave them one." he shrugs. "It was a detail the police never knew."

I keep my eyes on him as I remove the plastic from my stomach. I have no idea how he may react, and I have no way of defending myself if he were to stop me.

"I told them that I loved you too much. That every day I would watch you, telling myself that I could resist, knowing it was a lie." He's twirling the blade in his hand, but I know he's watching me, waiting for a reaction.

Hearing that the man you love fought with himself over killing you is a shock to the system. Knowing that he told other women, the women he murdered to keep me alive, the women he touched. That's what disturbs me. What angers me.

"You're jealous." His eyes lift to mine, a cruel smirk dancing on his lips.

"I'm not."

"Let's not lie anymore, shall we?" He gives a small wave with the scalpel and I flinch.

"You'd talk to those women but not me." I try to get the wrap he's placed around my chest free, but give up. He's got it too tight, and I'm wasting time.

I'm grateful he's let me free, but I know better. He has plans.

"I talked to a lot of people, Isabella. But yes, they had a right to know why they were dying." His chuckle is vicious as he stands, coming up behind me.

"You're a monster." I reach behind me, catching him off guard as I grab the scalpel, and shove it into his shoulder. I push the rest of the plastic off me, falling to the floor as I try to get away from him.

His deep sadistic, laugh shocks me, and just as I get the plastic off my ankles his face pops below the table.

"Did you really think that would stop me?" he asks, pulling the blade from his shoulder. "I've had _much _worse, and expected _so _much better from you, Isabella. We should really work on your aim." he grabs my arm, pulling me up roughly, and shoving me against the table.

"Asshole."

"Here," he holds out the handle, his blood still covering it. "I've got another. Now let's try that again, shall we? This time, give it hell." His eyes flash, excitement dancing in the green.

"You want me to stab you?" My eyes widen as he shoves the handle in my hand.

"I want you to try," his fingers close around mine, and for a split second I can feel the electricity, the absolute need I have for him, coursing through our hands.

"No," I shake my head, unwilling to hurt him, snatching my hand back.

"Let's give you a reason then." He turns pulling out some sort of bundle. "You've never seen my kit, have you baby?" With a flick of his wrist the small roll flies open, rolling down the table, revealing what nightmares are made of.

I gasp, as his eyes flash to mine. "Beautiful isn't she? I named her after you." His fingers dance over different tools. A butcher knife, pliers, a bone saw, a syringe. There are over a dozen different blades, each one clean, reflecting the light above. "This is, Bella."

I gasp, looking at it all.

"This was... that's how you killed them?" I can't take my eyes away from him.

"It's like art. You have to have the right tools, they have to feel right in your hands, or the finished product is nothing more than a mess." He fingers the tip of a particularly long knife before pulling it out. "Would you like to hold it? See how it feels in your hands?" he flips the knife, catching the steel, handing it to me.

I feel it in my hand, the weight perfect.

"Now, do you want to stab something?" The knife clattering to floor, along with my jaw.

"I'm not stabbing anything." I move away from the table, staring at the blade at my feet.

"Pick it up," he demands, his knuckles turning white as he grips the table.

"I can't do that." I take another step back.

"You will pick it, or I'll pick it up for you." He's closer now, only inches from it, and I know he will.

"Have at it." I wave at the knife, and he's on it, blade in hand, eye's seething.

"Stop it, Isabella!" He moves towards me, the blade in his hand, and I can see it, the explosion behind those green eyes I love so much. He's going to kill me. "Stop fucking denying it. Stop fucking being a coward."

"Edward just calm down." I know he won't.

"Calm down? You think I've been anything but calm? You think I would come anywhere near you if I wasn't calm?" His eyes narrow, and his breathing quickens as he watches me back into the corner.

"You said you didn't want this."

"I say a lot of fucking things," His laugh echoes around the tiny room as tears fall down my face.

"You won't hurt me." I deny it, but I can see it written all over him. He would. Over and over. Enjoying every moment of it.

"And you are so damn sure now, are you." He moves to strike at me, and I move, quickly dodging him. "Smart girl."

"Don't do this."

"WHY ISABELLA?" He screams as he stalks me around the table, the scalpel scraping against the metal, making me cringe.

"I don't want to die, Edward. Please!" I beg, I scream.

"Not good enough," he shakes his head and I can see he's losing it, coming unhinged as he runs his free hand through his hair, pulling at it.

"If you kill me Edward, thats it. I can't come back. I can't love you. I can't touch you." I look around, eyes wild, searching for something, anything to stop him.

"Stop fucking begging. Where is the Isabella I know?" He strikes my arm with the blade, blood splattering across his shirt. "Look at what you're making me do?" His hands are shaking as he wipes the blood off his cheek, staring down at me.

"She's terrified okay? Look at what you're doing to me?" I raise my arm, wincing as I feel the skin opening further.

"And I'll keep cutting you until you stop me." He raises his hand, ready to strike and I slap him, startling myself.

"Is that what you wanted?" I stumble back, trying to get away from him.

"Absolutely." His smile is wide, and wicked as he rubs his thumb over his busted lip. "I fucking love when you hit me, baby."

'I'd kill you if I thought I could," I spit at him as I try stopping the blood flow from my arm.

"Oh I'd enjoy it if you'd try." He's on me before the words leave his mouth, his lips on mine his hands tangling in my hair.

I can taste the blood on him, mixing with my own. It's the most erotic thing I've ever felt, kissing him, the force of it all, the anger behind it.

"You are so fucking wet," he whispers yanking my head to the side as his fingers slip between us. "I bet you want me to fuck you, don't you? Bend you over right here, right over that table and ram my cock inside of you?" There's a bite to my neck, his hands pushing my knees apart, my back against the wall.

"Please," I beg, wrapping my legs around him and letting him fill me.

"Mine," his teeth in my shoulder, his hands possessing me.

"Always." A kiss, my tongue on his skin, his name on my lips.

He's quick, going deep and hard, his forehead against mine, eyes telling me what words never will. We don't make love, we never have, and we never will. This is his I love you. His I hate you. I need you.

This is me giving him everything he thinks I can't. He tells me I won't.

The scalpel is still in his hand, cutting his palm, fisted at my side and I can smell the blood when he his grip tightens as I fall apart around him. He caresses my cheek, kisses my forehead and steps back, leaving me panting and more relaxed than I have any right to be in this room.

I'm his push and he's my pull. It's ecstasy wrapped in flames.

"I love you," I say to him, once my heart calms and I have the strength to look at him.

I stand, wanting to touch him, to hold him, kiss him. I want to show him more than anything right now, but I know the look. The one he's giving me as his knee bounces.

The light touches his eyes, reflecting his true nature behind it, and I know.

I'm going to die.

"You never fucking loved ME!" He screams, striking at me with the knife. I don't hold back this time, ramming the scalpel into him as well, as he laughs.

I don't see where I hit him, I don't even look for it, knowing somehow I missed.

I feel his as it enters my side, the flesh splitting and swallowing the tip as if it were always meant to be there.

I fall to my knees, pulling his table down with me, the tools falling, scattering all around me, covered in my blood. I watch the blood as it pours through my fingers, the red staining my pale skin and I watch as pistol falls to the floor, the sound echoing around us.

"Edward?" I cough, my body heavy as my eyes widen. Blood is spilling from me faster than I thought possible. It's warm against my thigh, sticky, thick.

He's standing stock still, his eyes on the blood coming from my stomach. I can see the dread, the hate, the sadness. I hear the blade fall to the floor as his knees buckle, and he hits the floor right in front of me.

"What did I do?" He's scrambling to get closer to me, pulling me into his lap. his hands are on my face, pulling my hair back, and his lips are on mine. "Not this way. Not like this. You can't die." I can hear the pain in his voice.

"Edward. I need... call 911, leave and let them help me. I need you to run." I whisper, fighting sleep.

"Don't you dare!" He slaps my face as my eyes begin to drift close.

He looks at me, his deep green eyes making me smile, as he lifts me up, laying me on the table.

"You stupid girl." his laugh is watery as he turns to his table. I can hear drawers being pulled out, metal hitting metal, as my body begins to shiver and my teeth chatter.

"Tell me." I grab his hand, pulling him closer to me. I only need the words. Three words he never says. Words that would make everything worth it.

"You aren't dying. Stop being ridiculous." He pries my fingers from his, pulling out his phone.

I can't make out what he's saying, I can't hear anything but the rush of blood in my ears and my heart beating in my chest. I lift my hand from my stomach, watching as the blood drips down my wrist, the color mesmerizing me.

"Help is coming, you need to hold the fuck on. Do you hear me, Isabella?" I feel him hover over me, his hands on my face, making me look at him.

"Your eyes." My hands on his face, blood stained fingerprints on his cheek, and he's smiling. It's a smile that shatters me, kicking me in the stomach and breaking me. Soft green eyes that said I do. Bright green eyes that carried me to bed on our honeymoon.

Green eyes that make my world spin.

"BREATHE!" He's slamming on my chest, his hands pumping my heart. Just like it's always been. "Damn you, Bella! Don't you dare pull this shit! Do you fucking hear me?"

I can taste the blood, with every pump it fills my mouth, and falls out the corner.

He's on my mouth, breathing into me, for me. Giving me life. Giving me him.

"Move! I need to shock her!"

I feel it, the spark, it's quick, making my entire body bounce against the steel and I sit up, spitting blood and trying hard to catch my breath.

"Edward!" The tears sting my face, and my body is on fire, but I need him.

"I'm so sorry, but his pulse is weak..." I look into strange blue eyes and scramble off the table.

"No." I shake Edward, sitting between his legs, pulling his face up to look at me.

I see it then, the end of the scalpel sticking out of his chest, dead center of his heart.

I did this. I stabbed him.

"Don't touch that. It's the only thing keeping him from bleeding out."

"Then fix him," I snap, my hands shaking, hovering over the the handle. "FIX HIM GOD DAMN IT!" I reach behind Edward, grabbing the gun poking out from under the table and turn, pointing right between blue eyes.

"I've done everything I can, but I'm not him." His head leans, pointing toward Edward on the floor. I don't care about the tears in this man's eyes. They mean nothing. Less than nothing.

"You are not going to let him die." I'm shaking, and I can feel the blood running over my stomach, hear it dripping onto the floor below me.

"I don't have a choice!" He screams at me and a flash goes off sending me backwards into the table.

"I didn't either." I say, watching him fall to the floor, the barrel of the gun still smoking in my hand. I can hear someone outside, a car door slamming, and I move closer to Edward.

"This isn't supposed to be the end." I lay my head on Edward's leg. I can feel it shaking as his hand lays against the open wound on my stomach.

"This isn't the end for us," he coughs, opening his eyes and offering me a weak smile.

"I love you." The tears fall from my eyes as I lift the gun and bring it to my mouth.

"Always," His wink is blurry, but his smile is what I'll never forget. Beautiful.

I feel the metal burning my lips, but I don't flinch, I remember his face, those eyes and I let go.

**THANK YOU!**

**All of you. Readers, reviewers, lurkers, rec'rs. You are fucking beautiful in my book. Amazing. I can't begin to express what this story means to me, and to have you all here, supporting me each and everyday. It's the most amazing feeling. **

**To everyone on FB, to the new friends I've made, you guys have no idea the smile you put on my face today. **

**Now, some of you have asked for a sequel/prequel, for EPOV, and mostly for MORE! **

**Stay tuned. **

**XOXO darknnerdy**

**The sequel Gods and Monsters has posted! **


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